What is Real?
Working with coaching clients and with coaches when I am their supervisor, we often explore topics about being authentic and not pretending to be something you’re not. For trainee coaches, there is also sometimes a concern about whether or not they can be real, their true selves.
I’ve recently found myself referring to the following passage from the fabulous children’s book The Velveteen Rabbit, by Margery Williams and thought I’d share it here to inspire you:
What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?” “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit. “Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.” “Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, or “bit by bit?” “It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real, you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
(Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit)
I’m here to be real, and I’m here to help you find and share the real you. To find out more, sign up for my newsletter and receive inspiration, tools and resources to help you navigate change.
